It would seem like a new phase is about to start in this journey—a phase that I had not counted on coming to pass at this point in my life. However, it is a change that I believe will bring me closer to God, and one that I will be able to see God’s blessings over the people who chose to go after the calling He has placed in their lives.

Martin Luther King Jr. said during his acceptance speech when he was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize at the University of Oslo in 1964:

“I refuse to accept the idea that the ‘is-ness’ of man’s present nature makes him morally incapable of reaching up for the eternal ‘ought-ness’ that forever confronts him.”

is-ness
It is amazing how often I can be enthralled by my circumstances and my logic, such that I always overlook the simple fact that God is simply able. Such circumstances as financial aspirations, career considerations, lifestyle sacrifices, character inadequacies can often present so many layers of logic and reasoning, or perhaps a better word to use here would be excuses, so much so as to incapacitate the ability to move fowards. That being said, I am not saying that all concerns should be thoughtlessly cast to the winds. That would be totally irresponsible.

Over the last few months, it had not been easy, but it was a time where there was much growth and knowledge gleaned. Juggling university, work and ministries is quite the handful; however, trying to do so on an intensive level is definitely something that I would not subject myself to any more. Not only was my physical and mental health heavily affected, I felt myself being drawn away from God steadily. It was truly a humbling process to step back and assess all that I was doing, to finally admit that this was not something I want and slowly taking steps to come back to Him.

On another note, during that same period, I was presented with a consideration that I would never have considered in the past (I shall talk more about this when more details have been finalised). Despite having made a decision early on, it did not settle that well within me; it was a decision based on logical reasoning and that which I have come to realise stems from a selfish desire. And as I struggled for clarity and assurance, I was presented with the various aspects of the Heart of God—the very thing that burns within the very heart of mine—time and again.

ought-ness
And so, I made my decision earlier this week (as mentioned previously, I will talk more of this at a later date). I felt the peace of God within my heart and the assurance from God that He will take care of everything. I believe I also felt the excitement that there will be so much that God is going to show me; I can only wait in anticipation!

In the past year, I have come to realise that the calling God has on my life is so much more than I had originally thought it to be. Much of my original revelations and thinking have been brought to a new and higher level of faith expectations.

changes
With nine days into the month of May, my state of emotions continues to extend in the realm of excitement. Over the next few months, there will be so many changes. These changes are so going to affect so many different areas of my life that I do not know how I am going to handle them.

“Will I be able to get a new job soon?”

“Where is God going to lead me?”

“How are these changes going to affect me and those around me?”

So many questions… So much feelings… One answer.

Amasiah.

Advertisement